home. puking in laundry basket.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Boobs speak an international language.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
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