Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize