Someone shit on the floor
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
