the new term for farting is butt boxing.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
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