Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
Randomize
