his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I'm sobbing to NWA
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
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