So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize