Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I think I won the penis lottery.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Randomize
