Michael Bay diarrhea
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
