Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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