Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Did I show you my penis last night?
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
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