he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
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