Capitaan dildo arrescate!
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
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