I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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