Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
