Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Randomize
