R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
two words: eviction party
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
