problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Randomize
