my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
Randomize
