I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
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