FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
did you just send me my own nude
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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