Non-Jews are for practice
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize
