At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
