I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
