i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Randomize
