Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
