I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
