Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize
