so that wasnt chicken after all
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
porn star boner night. come get it.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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