marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
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