I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
