you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Randomize
