I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
I didn't notice because vodka
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
