i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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