My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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