This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
