i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
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