i think my tv is drunk
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
