you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
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