Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
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