Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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