Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Randomize
