Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Randomize