yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
