BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
