Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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