Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
