we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
