it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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