I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
...so i touched it.
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
